If you know me, I don't have to tell you what's going on, and if you don't know me, all I can say is that we are going through a very tragic loss right now. My boyfriend's oldest son (or pseudo stepson as we like to call it) has passed away. He was only 17.
It's obviously been a tough road, and will continue to be one for a very long time. And forever, really. Our whole lives changed in one moment, and things will never be the same again. Not to say that there won't be good, happy, fun, love-filled moments in the future, because I know there will be. There already have been, which is a definitely blessing. But everything in life is now without him. Every milestone moment in life, and there are tons, is without him. I never knew I could be so sad.
Fortunately, we've had an incredible outpouring of support from far and wide. Friends, families, co-workers, regulars from the restaurant where Rich and I work, the list goes on. Richard is one of the best people I've ever met, and obviously that feeling is very mutual. It was shocking to see how many people were touched by this, even if they had never met Irn, simply because they know Richard and care about him.
I'm lucky enough to have an amazing family (love youuus) and Richard's family is amazing too, and has been a total rock through all of this. I've always felt close with them, and this experience has only served to strengthen that. I've also built a bit of a relationship with a few people I never thought I'd come within ten feet of. So, it's been a bit of a funny ride.
I wish I could send a personal, heartfelt thank you to every single person who sent love, cards, food, SPCA donations and thoughts to us through all of this. It really has made all the difference. Knowing you are loved (and knowing there is food in the fridge for dinner!) really has made this easier.
I've been lucky enough to be taken into Irn's mom's family as one of them throughout all of this too. They are a wonderful group of people and spending time with them has made me feel like I have even more family around. And I'm a family kinda girl. You really see how important family is in moments like this, even if they aren't your own. I've also learned I have a reserve of emotional strength deep down in there I'd never even have imagined. I feel like a grownup all of a sudden, and I feel like I can move through life with a little more...something....than I had before. Maybe a tough skin is what I mean, but in a good way.
Anyways, just felt I had to put something here about all of this before I could start back to business. Have a look at your priorities for me today, and realize what is important. Let go of any silly grudges or negativity, stop worrying about small things and spend time with the people you care about. That's really what is important, and you need to gather all the moments you can.
Miss you Irn, it was a pleasure.
xo
Linds
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